Abortions Are Becoming #TACKY

 Both pictures from My Aunt Kathy's Wedding back in the day. First photo: My Mom channeling Amy Winehouse on the far left, irrelevant women wearing polyester everywhere else.

Last weekend my older sister Erica got married! The whole experience really shook me up and totally made me realize that I don't want to die alone and whatnot. I mean there has to be more to life than complaining about how single and desperate I am even though it happens to be one of my favorite pass times and I should probably add it to my Facebook profile under activities.

My sister and her now husband Gerald are $oulmates to say the least. They met in New Orleans during my sisters first year of college at some gross club. He asked her for her number but she only gave him 2 digits and  told him that he had to come back for the rest. Hashtag Classy right?

Anyways after stalking her he somehow got the rest of her digits and they started dating and stuff. For some reason they ended up breaking up (My sister doesn't tell me shit) and she started dating this really lame local rapper dude. During this time my parents forced my sister to move back home (Waukegan, Illinois to be exact) because her grades were slipping via nights twerking on Bourbon street, eating crayfish and jambalaya and other scandalous activities people in Nawlinz do. 

Her and the wannabe rapper actually lasted awhile and they even got an apartment together. But of course they ended up breaking up because they were just two different people. She was going to school to become a nurse and for some reason he was convinced that his mediocre Soulja Boy-esque music was totally going to make him rich and famous #WRONG

Erica and Gerald somehow started talking again. They dated long distance for a couple of years and somehow they actually made it.Yup, my sister was good enough to be proposed to and I'm damn proud!

Personally, getting married has never been on my "To-do List". The only thing that has ever excited me about getting married is that I get to buy an expensive ass dress and receive a whole bunch of free shit from relatives that I don't even know the names of. But as of lately being trapped with one person for the rest of my life has has become really appealing to me. Abortions are even starting to seem TACKY!!! Yawl should be concerned about me, like seriously.

Something about seeing my sister so happy got me thinking that maybe its time to set my cynical thinking aside. Maybe wedding receptions aren't really just divorce pre-partys's, and just maybe I could be happy with one person, and one person could be happy with me.

The hunts on,

Miss. Purp